Baseball’s Best of the Worst Awards 2018
What an incredible season for Major League Baseball! There were so many great moments throughout the year and if I could remember any one of them specifically I might not be secretly terrified that I have early-onset dementia.
Okay, so, checking my notes (aka, searching Google.com) it appears there were some pretty spectacular moments like the Cubs’ David Bote’s walk-off grand slam, the Athletics’ Sean Manaea’s no-hitter against the mighty Red Sox and the Dodgers’ Yasiel Puig’s three-homer game against the Cardinals down the stretch.
We talk about the end of the season pennant races in the latest episode of The Foul Territory Podcast.
I don’t know about the rest of you—mainly because we haven’t been formally introduced—but I have been enjoying the season quite a bit. Being a Red Sox fan has made that more likely, however, with all the “rebuilding” teams out there, it’s easy to imagine other teams’ fans being somewhat disgruntled.
Here’s a little bit of advice: One of the easiest ways to feel good about what’s happening in your life is seeing others do terribly—especially your enemies—but also just anyone. This explains the enormous popularity of “fail” videos on YouTube. Maybe that makes us all bad people. Maybe it doesn’t. But probably it does.
So, here we are at the end of the season and as other writers are preparing their articles for who should win the major awards in baseball for exceptional performances, let’s take a moment and revel in the awfulness of the past year together. Enjoy!
Worst Manager: Mike Matheny
The St. Louis Cardinals are going to miss the playoffs by the slightest of margins. Margins that would not even be there if Matheny hadn’t been tangling up the team for the first half of the season. How bad was Matheny? He made his replacement Mike Shildt look like a decent manager. Mike Shildt. Who? Exactly. This is always a hyper-competitive category, especially since social media and instant news sources allow us to see bad decisions in real time. But, even in half a season Matheny managed to out-terrible all the others.
Worst Pitcher: Tyler Chatwood
A lot of people seemed to think that this pitcher with an unusually high walk rate would somehow stop walking batters if he no longer had to pitch the hitter-friendly Coors Field. So, the Cubs signed him to pitch at the hitter-friendly Wrigley Field. You won’t believe what happened next!
Worst Hitter: Trayce Thompson
Y’all thought for sure I was going to drop Chris Davis here. Yeah, he’s been awful. Maybe the worst full season by a position player. But here’s the thing that will bake your noodle: Thompson has been almost as bad, but in only one-third the time. His negative value per plate appearance is one of the worst in history.
Worst Fielder: Bryce Harper
There were a lot of contenders for this one in 2018, but Harper come out on top (or is it “on bottom”?). Normally he’s a solid defender in right field but with the Nationals’ injury problems, he was forced to play center field instead and now we all know that Bryce Harper is no center fielder. So, I guess this was one of those awards that really was a team accomplishment.
Worst Umpire: Unsure
If you Google “Bad Umpire Calls 2018” there are “About 8,770,000 results.” That seems about right. I don’t get why we can’t be using some sort of technology with these guys. I mean, come on! We put Ryan Gosling on the moon but we can’t give an umpire a simple yes/no device utilizing the technology that’s already in place.
Worst Team: Baltimore Orioles
What can you say about the Baltimore Orioles? They knew it was coming. You knew it. I knew it. They were a team of mostly old players that could really only get worse and they had to play a majority of their games against the Red Sox, Yankees and Rays. Honorable mention goes to the Giants for spending $200 million and not coming anywhere near the playoffs. That is a very difficult achievement.
Worst Offense: San Francisco Giants
Their pitching staff saved them from being the worst team, but their offense has been terrible. Historically so. Like, cholera epidemic historically bad. At the beginning of the season, if you kinda squinted at their lineup, you could maybe sorta convince yourself they might be okay. Then the injuries showed up. And the injuries were everywhere—much like San Francisco’s human poop problem on their streets.
Worst Defense: Philadelphia Phillies
Toronto was the actual worst defensive team, but the Phillies win the award because they were really bad and their defensive problems were more self-inflicted and actually affected their playoff chances. The Phillies signed Carlos Santana in the off-season to play first base and thus push their current first baseman Rhys Hoskins to the outfield. And the result was exactly what you’d expect. The high-scoring Citizens Bank Park is the wrong place to have a bad defense. You need to get as many outs as possible.
Worst Pitching: Baltimore Orioles
“Worst” doesn’t really capture how terrible this Orioles pitching staff was. Especially since these days the kids are always saying something is the worst when it’s really just a little displeasing. “OMG this frappuccino doesn’t have whipped cream. It’s the worst!” If your frappuccino was accidentally mixed with acid, that would be the worst. And that’s what Baltimore’s pitching was.
Worst GM: The Mets Trio
Unfortunately, the Mets actual GM, Sandy Alderson, is dealing with cancer and had to take a leave of absence. Also, unfortunately, the team decided to have Alderson’s support staff take over the function of GM. So, they had three different guys that were “in charge” of the team’s personnel moves. This could have gone one of two ways: 1) the three join forces to create a Voltron of GM awesomeness or 2) the Three Stooges. By the All-Star break, the Mets were well out of the playoffs and needed to make moves to help their future. They didn’t. NYUCK NYUCK NYUCK.
Worst Owner: Jeffrey Loria
The Frank McCourt Award goes to the Marlins’ Jeffrey Loria. I know he sold the Marlins, but he was so terrible that he gets the award for at least one more year. The Mets’ Fred Wilpon will have to wait a year for his chance.
If you feel like I left something out, let me know. Don’t keep it bottled up inside you. It’s okay to let it out. You’ll feel better. I know I do.
